Ben & Loch Lomond

Important events coming up:-

Love to Dance workshop and tea dance on February 21 – that is next Saturday in the Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver at 8:30 am.  There is still space for dancers at all levels in the workshop on Saturday morning.  There are two levels to be taught by Richard Bennett (Salt Spring) & Heather Graham (Bellingham) and more information can be had from Jean, 604-371-1939 or Fran, 604-922-6842. Lunch for workshop participants will be provided and there is live music for the morning classes.

The Tea dance is in the afternoon starting at 2 pm with music by the Tartan Players with many easy dances on the programme.  See for more details.
Cost $55 ($40 with Beginner Coupon or Full-time Students) $15 Dance Only

Then there is the Heather Ball on March 21 for who have been attending Scottish Country dance classes and a Concert by two Scottish musicians, Colin Dewar, accordion and Alasdair MacLeod, piano and accordion on Sunday, March 22 in Holy Trinity Anglican Church, 1440 West 12th Avenue, Vancouver at 2 pm.  Tickets,  $20 for concert only, there is a special deal if purchasing a ball ticket and a concert  tickets, can be obtained at – Events Calendar or at the door.

Brechin Cathedral

The next Ceilidh dance in the last Friday of February which normally would be the last day of the month but 2020 is a leap year so Friday, February 28 is the date of the dance.  I hope this gives you enough time to plan on joining us for what will be a fun evening of dance, laughter, good company, fantastic music and exercise.

Scottish country dance classes have started up again – you can check the location and times of all the classes on the Ceilidh dance website or at – you never know it just might be your thing!

Tell people about the ceilidh dances, how much fun they are, how reasonable, the fact that you don’t need to know anything or need a partner, how patient the teacher is and what a great band we have.

Word of mouth really is the best form of advertising and we ask you all to help us.  This will be an excellent way to work off these extra grams and clear your head so please do come along – it really is a fun evening.

Buchanan Street, Glasgow

The hall has been booked for another season of Ceilidh Dances.  The dates are:
February 28; March 27 & April 24 that is the last Friday of the month.

You can help by coming along to the Ceilidh dances, by bringing friends (and enemies!) by telling people about the Ceilidh Dances, by bringing a group of 8 or more so that you all qualify for a discount of $1 each.  No partner or experience required and remember if you claim to have two left feet we’ll show you how to use the right one!

Edinburgh & the Pentland Hills

The next Ceilidh Dance is the Friday, February 28th.  The dance will follow the usual format with the “class” from 7 – 8 pm and the dance, with Calanais providing the music, from 8 – 11 pm.  Mark your calendars NOW!   Even if you can’t make it in time for the class; come to the dance, it is lots of fun.

If you have a group of 8 or more, then everyone in your group qualifies for $1 discount off the amazingly low admission price of $15 ($10 for students).  You have to let everyone in your group know the password you have chosen which you then relay to me ( before midnight on the Wednesday preceding the dance, that way you do not all have to arrive together.

There are refreshments/drinks (including beer, cider, juice, etc.) available for a donation   So apart from the fun, exercise and great music of Scottish Ceilidh dancing there is all the ingredients for a great evening.

No need to be scared if you don’t know how – we will teach you and you won’t be the only newbie.  You will be a star before the night is out.  Make it a date – it will be a night you won’t forget.

Findlochty harbour

For those new to ceilidh dancing the class is a great introduction to Scottish Country dancing and you will soon find out you are not the only one who does not know their left from right or back from front!!  We teach everything and the dance follows the same format.  Everything is very relaxed so you don’t have to worry about anything.  If you can walk; you can dance.  Wear flat comfy shoes and loose, layered clothing as it is warm work reeling and spinning.

What is a Ceilidh dance? It is informal, easy Scottish Country dancing in a relaxed style for all ages. We teach everything, no experience or partner required just a desire to have fun an ability to move to the wonderful beat of the lively music and to enjoy the company of other like-minded folk.

Hushinish Road, Isle of Harris

The next Ceilidh dance is on Friday, February 28, 2020 at the Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver with the usual class at 7 pm and the dance following from 8 – 11 pm. Pay at the door – $15 ($10 for students). Tell your friends etc. about the dances, they are lots of fun.

  • The other dates are
  • 2020
  • February 28
  • March 27
  • April 24

The dances are all held at the Scottish Cultural Centre,  8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver (73rd and Hudson which is between Granville and Oak Streets). They are all held on Friday evenings and where possible the last Friday of each month – the exceptions are December (as we never schedule one but we have one in early January) and January (because of Burns.)


An 80-year-old woman was arrested for shoplifting.

When she went before the judge he asked her, “What did you steal?”

She replied: a can of peaches.

The judge asked her why she had stolen them and she replied that she was hungry. 

The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can.  She replied 6.

The judge then said, “I will give you 6 days in jail.”

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment the woman’s husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something.

He said,” What is it?  “

The husband said, “She also stole a can of peas


Scottish Country dance classes have started up again  and you will be made very welcome if you want to come along – it is never too late.  Now would be a good time to come to a class and see what all the fuss is about.  Why not give us a try – you never know it just might be the fun exercise class that you have been looking for.  Music, movement, memory, camaraderie, laughter and a sense of achievement are all things you will experience.  Come on – what have you got to lose, most first classes are free.  Look under the “classes” tab for a class near you.


Lying around, pondering the problems of the world, I realized that, at my age, I don’t really give a rat’s ass anymore.

If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal.

A whale swims all day, only eats fish, and drinks water, but is still fat.

A rabbit runs, and hops, and only lives 15 years, while a tortoise doesn’t run, and does mostly nothing, yet it lives for 150 years. And they tell us to exercise? I don’t think so.

Now that I’m older, here’s what I’ve discovered:

  1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
  2. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed with prunes and all-bran.
  3. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
  4. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
  5. If all is not lost, then where the heck is it?
  6. It was a whole lot easier to get older, than it was to get wiser.
  7. Some days, you’re the top dog, some days you’re the hydrant.
  8. I wish the buck really did stop here; I sure could use a few of them.
  9. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.
  10. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
  11. It is hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.
  12. The world only beats a path to your door when you’re in the bathroom.
  13. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he’d have put them on my knees.
  14. When I’m finally holding all the right cards, everyone wants to play checkers.
  15. It is not hard to meet expenses . . . They’re everywhere.
  16. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth..
  17. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter . . I go somewhere to get something, and then wonder what I’m “here after.”
  18. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
  19. It is a lot better to be seen than viewed.
  20. Have I sent this message to you before…or did I get it from you ???

The next regular Ceilidh Dance is FRIDAY February 28, 2020.  I sure hope you can come and bring lots of friends.


If you have not tasted a Tunnock’s wafer you have missed something good – really good


There is a very, very tall coconut tree and there are four animals… 
A Lion
  A Chimp  A Giraffe   
A Squirrel
They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to
get a banana off the tree.
Who do you guess will win?
Your answer will reflect your personality.
So think carefully…..
Try and answer within 30 seconds.
Got your answer?

I’ll give you the answer later in the newsletter


The Scottish Cultural Centre is a pretty unique and wonderful asset and space is available for rent to anyone or any group. The Centre does not run itself but is actually run by the  Scottish Cultural Centre Society (SCCS) which is a charitable society.  Donations, bequests are welcome and a tax deductible receipt will be issued for gifts of more than $25.


Looking over West Kilbride to the Isle of Arran


The next Ceilidh Dance is Friday, February 28, 2020. That will be the fifth one of  the season and the second of 2020. There is lots of time for you all to get yourselves and your friends organized to come along for another fun, filled evening. Come and dance, it is lots of fun and really easy. Everything is taught from scratch – you won’t be the only newbie!


Loch Morlich


Michelle has very kindly made up a Facebook event page for the Ceilidh but you need to “Search for Vancouver Ceilidh on Facebook and “Like” us to receive updates on upcoming Ceilidhs and other events”. Then, if you “Like” the Vancouver Ceilidh FB page (do as described above), you too will receive updates AND be able to share those updates and events on your personal Facebook page to your friends and ask that they “Like” and “Share”, etc. Ceilidh Dances are great ways to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries etc. Invite all your friends to come and join you at the Ceilidh. You are welcome to bring your own cake and we’ll even sing for you!!


Maybole Castle


If your answer is:
Lion = you’re dull.
Chimpanzee = you’re dense.
Giraffe = you’re a complete moron.
Squirrel = you’re hopeless.



Obviously you’re stressed and overworked.  You should take  some time off and relax.  Have two glasses of wine.  A full box of Chocolates.  And a nice lunch.

Now hurry up and forward it to someone else.
They may need those glasses of Wine.


Some fun and interesting sites: – note if you have a link to something you think others will enjoy send me the link. Sound on, full screen:

Subject: Britain’s got Talent – Move over Susan Boyle you are not going to believe this one

Actually, you can’t get sufficiently prepared for this one!

Who says you can’t teach cats to do tricks?

Moscow Cat Theatre

Britain’s Got Talent is off to another contest for 2012.  It seems like only yesterday when we were all blown away with Susan Boyle’s rise from obscurity to the world musical stage.  This year’s star act might just be seventeen-year-old Jonathon Antoine – singing with sixteen-year-old partner Charlotte Jaconelli.  Here’s the YouTube video of their audition with judges David Walliams, Alesha Dixon, Amanda Holden and Simon Cowell.

Remember this in 2012?

Costa Concordia run aground

If this really took place it is a riot.


A Dyson makes the difference!

Dyson Vac

Mt. Sinai hospital


COMING EVENTS IN THE NEXT FEW WEEKS: Note – please check the Branch website for and last-minute changes.

Feb 22 Love to Dance workshop & dance at Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver.  Teachers Richard Bennett, Salt Spring & Heather Graham, Bellingham.   $55 ($40 with beginner coupon of full-time students) $15 for dance only.  Very popular so register early.  Registration forms available though local clubs or online at  Lunch provided.  More info from Jean at 604-371-1939 or Fran at 604-922-6842
Feb 28 Ceilidh Dance at the Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver – no partner or experience required – live music with Calanais – refreshments available – class from 7 – 8 p.m. followed by dance from 8 – 11 p.m. – all dances walked, talked and called – admission at the door $15 (students $10)
Feb 29 Seattle Branch Grange dance
Feb 29 Please save the date for the University of Victoria, SFU Centre for Scottish Studies, and Saint Mary’s University symposium “Coastal Scots,” taking place in Victoria at the St Andrews Presbyterian Church at Broughton and Douglas streets.  Our keynote speaker for this event is David Worthington from the University of the Highlands and Islands who will present on “Scotland’s Coastal Pasts.”  This FREE full day event features a line up of speakers including Wendy Wickwire (Uvic), Jean Barman (UBC), Katie McCullough (SFU), Hilary Doda (Dalhousie/SMU), Sylvia Olsen, and Erin Grant. With a performance by the Victoria Gaelic Choir.
the symposium website is now live! You can check out the programme, how to reserve your seat via Eventbrite, and all other symposium details by clicking the link here:
Mar  7 CEILIDH/TWMPATH/BARN DANCE coming up!  Time: 7:30 – 10:30pm Where: The Cambrian Hall, 215 East 17th Avenue, Vancouver  Band: The RATTLEBONE BAND   Tickets: $10 adults, $5 kids, available from Pat Morris (604 536 9556 – email
Mar  8 Burnaby Spring Tea Dance in Confederation Hall, 4584 Albert Street, Burnaby at 1.00 p.m.  Music by Vancouver Fiddle Orchestra – $25
Mar 14 Vancouver Island Ceilidh dance
Mar 21 Heather Ball at the Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver with music by Colin Dewar and Alasdair MacLeod.  Reception 5:45, Dinner 6:15, Grand March 7:45.  Tickets – $80 RSCDS members; $90 non-members
Note: $95 ($105 non RSCDS members) for both Ball and concert
Mar 22 Concert with Colin Dewar and Alasdair MacLeod at Holy Trinity Anglican Church, 1440 West 12th Avenue, Vancouver at 2 pm  Tickets for concert only – $20
Mar 27 Ceilidh Dance at the Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver – no partner or experience required – live music with Calanais – refreshments available – class from 7 – 8 p.m. followed by dance from 8 – 11 p.m. – all dances walked, talked and called – admission at the door $15 (students $10)
Apr  4 Glenayre Spring Dance



 The next Ceilidh Dance is Friday, February 28, 2020 – that is the last Friday of the month but not the last day of the month.  Same time, same place, same amount of fun and entertainment. Now it is up to you all to help by planning on coming along and bringing loads of friends, family, acquaintances, etc. Please do your best to spread the word. Let me know if you would like a poster to put up.

Rouken Glen, Glasgow


What a great gift this newsletter would make (and it is free!!) Please pass along the website to your friends and ask them to subscribe.

Please keep opening the newsletter!! Any and all comments and suggestions are welcome.


An elderly couple, Margaret and Bert, moved to Texas .

Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home.

Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife, “Notice anything different about me?”

Margaret looked him over. “Nope.”

Frustrated, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots.

Again he asked Margaret, a little louder this time, “Notice anything different NOW?”

Margaret looked up and said in her best deadpan, “Bert, what’s different? It’s hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it’ll be hanging down again tomorrow.”


“Nope. Not a clue”, she replied.


Without missing a beat Margaret replied, “Shoulda bought a hat, Bert. Shoulda bought a hat.”


If anyone has any suggestions or complaints regarding the newsletter, please let me know – Please do not complain to your server that this is junk mail. There is a link on the e-mail should you wish to unsubscribe.



Come Scottish Country Dancing – it is lots of fun. Just ask anyone who came along to the Dancing in the Park. We had great audience participation so I hope you will all come along and join one of our great classes or at least come to one of the Ceilidh Dances.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = =

As good as this bar is,” said the Scotsman, “I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow , there’s a wee place called McTavish’s. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he’ll buy the fifth drink.”

“Well, Angus,” said the Englishman, “At my local in London , the Red Lion, the barman will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two.”

“Ahhh, dat’s nothin’,” said the Irishman, “back home in my favourite pub, the moment you set foot in the place, they’ll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like, actually. Then, when you’ve had enough drinks, they’ll take you upstairs and see dat you gets laid, all on the house!”

The Englishman and Scotsman were suspicious of the claims. The Irishman swore every word was true. “Did this actually happen to you?”

“Not meself, personally, no,” admitted the Irishman, “but it did happen to me sister quite a few times.”

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

The next Ceilidh Dance is Friday, February 28, 2020 with live music by Calanais. This is the fifth dance of the season. We need a good attendance with everyone coming along for a really fun evening


You still have time to spread the word about all the Ceilidh Dances as that is the best (and cheapest) form of advertising. It is great exercise and fun, for all ages, too. Here is a link where you can watch a short video of a Ceilidh Dance: and here is a link to the Facebook advert:
The format for all of the regular monthly Ceilidh Dances will be the same with the class from 7 – 8 p.m. and the dance from 8 – 11 p.m. and all dances will be walked and talked through.

They are all held at the Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver. The price is only – $15 or $10 for students which, for what you get is a super bargain – everyone is welcome. No partner is required and you should wear FLAT, comfy shoes and loose clothing. Children are also welcome but should be prepared to dance with other people as some of the dances require a change of partner. Don’t forget to bring a few extra $$$$ to help defray the cost of the refreshments which are otherwise free.


The Branch has opened a Facebook Page at “RSCDS-Vancouver” – check it out there are some good pictures etc. There is a link on both our website and the Branch website


“ – that’s a site for sore eyes”


Scottish Country Dance (SCD) classes are a place where you will be made very welcome.  Try the link to “classes” or go to and check for a class near you or one that has a convenient time and try it out.

Dance - blue

Come to a class soon – You will be made very welcome. Many classes have a policy that the first night is FREE! Plan to come along to try out a class. There are classes all around and on different nights so GIVE IT A GO! Go to either or www, for a list of class locations and times.

For those who don’t know SCD is a fabulous pastime (much better and lots more fun than golf!!) and is super exercise for body and mind. SCD is, naturally, rooted in Scotland but there are groups in almost every country so you can learn here and then dance with other groups when you vacation or travel. SCD is not to be confused with Highland Dancing which is more solo dancing. SCD is usually done with a partner in groups or sets however you do not need to come with a partner. It is more akin to Square Dancing.

It takes a year or two of classes, workshops, etc. to learn the basics then you can hone your skills in advanced classes. You start by learning the steps and formations. Dances (of which there are over 13,000) are made up of these formations so a good grounding will give you the ability to learn a new dance fairly quickly. SCD has its HQ in Scotland and is known as the Royal Scottish Country Dance Society (RSCDS) and there is a Vancouver Branch of the RSCDS under which there are many clubs throughout the Province (there is also a Branch in Seattle).

There are a great many classes and the ones in the Vancouver area are listed on the website. Come along – check us out – the first night is usually free and thereafter it will average about $6 a night and that’s for a 2 hour class!   You will find many friendly people who will be eager to help you and welcome you to their club. You never know you actually might like it!!  Check the list of classes at either at or Note that the latter website has the latest updates to temporary changes to times and locations.


as well there are classes all up and down Vancouver Island, a number of the Gulf Islands, the Cariboo, Okanagan, Sunshine Coast, etc. etc. and there are various groups all over this great Province, Country, World and who knows where else! Check the Branch website for all these details –


Loch aChroisg


: “I was playing chess with my friend and he said ‘Let’s make this more interesting’. So we stopped playing chess.”

My wife went out shopping and brought home the escalator. It was marked down.

What do you call a law student who tries to sue himself? Self tort.

Two cannibals eating a clown. One says, “Does this taste funny to you?”


The next regular monthly Ceilidh Dance will be held Friday, February 28, 2020 in the Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, (73rd & Hudson which is between Oak & Granville), Vancouver,

We need everyone to help us get as many new comers (as well as former Ceilidh Dancers) as possible to come and join us. The Ceilidh Dances are a great way to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, etc. Invite all your friends along. Contact me if you will have a group of 8 or more and we can give them a discount!!!

We Really NEED YOUR HELP to advertise the Ceilidh Dances!!!! It only costs $15 ($10 for students) – it is worth so much more in fun, exercise and camaraderie. Use any access to free adverts etc. You can also use things like the YouTube link or the Face-book page

Suggestions to improve our advertising are always welcome. Don’t forget to tell them about the website and get them to “subscribe” to the newsletter.

Most of you have been to at least one Ceilidh Dance so you know how it goes. You don’t need a partner; you don’t need any experience; you should wear FLAT soft soled shoes; we walk, talk, and call every dance and you should come to have fun and have a good evening of exercise and entertainment and maybe even to learn!

There is a FREE class from 7 – 8 p.m. and the dance from 8 – 11 p.m. with music by Calanais. Remember to bring some extra cash so you can make a donation towards the cost of the refreshments. Without these donations we will have to increase the price of admission again!!

The schedule for the 2018/19 season shapes up as follows:
All on Fridays of course and, except for January, it is the last Friday of the Month —

February 28
March 27
April 24

Come along and get some great exercise while also having lots of fun. We hope to have lots of new Ceilidh dancers. Remember to bring your smiles and wear flat shoes.
Please do your best to assist us in letting as many people know as possible. Use Face-book, e-mail, telephone or even word of mouth and tell everyone you know what a fun night it is.

We would like to attract more young adults and students from Universities and all the colleges. Somehow we have to get word out to these students etc. Please do all you can to help us. Come one, come all to the same place (Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver) and the same time (7 p.m. for the class and 8 – 11 p.m. for the dance) and the same amazing price ($15 or $10 for students.)


You should check the website – – from time to time as you can find various pages listing “Ceilidhs and Events;” Classes:” Duncan’s List;” etc. On these pages you can check all the upcoming events, where all the classes are located, times, etc. and some places to find Scottish things or some local trades, etc. I will continue to highlight the more current events in each week’s newsletter but, as stated, the calendar of all events will be available on the website.

You should also have a look at the Vancouver Branch website from time to time – – as there is always useful information on it and it is a very good-looking site.

If you have any questions regarding the Ceilidh Dances send them to me at Please check the website – for updates, pictures and news.

Dance – it is good for your health.

Keep sending jokes, pictures and info you wish to have included. Don’t forget to look at our web pages at If you know of anyone who would like to be on the mailing list please send them the web address – and ask them to subscribe.

Loch Doon

If anyone has good pictures from the Ceilidh Dances please send them to me so I can put them on the web page. If you have any announcements please send them to me preferably in Word; Times New Roman 12pt format with a layout similar to the one used in this newsletter. I occasionally hear of an event somewhere in our beautiful Province, on the Island or in the Interior, but don’t know all the details.


This newsletter reaches out to some 390 subscribers from all over the Province, Country and to many other countries as well, so please send me the details of your event and I will only be too happy to include them.


Arrochar Alps & Loch Katrine


Enjoy yourselves – come Scottish Country Dancing – for it is good for your health and you never know you just might …..!

See Coming Events on the website for info –

May your troubles be one, may your blessings be more,
and may nothing but happiness come through your door.

Duncan MacKenzie