NOTICE RE CEILIDH DANCES:-
The Ceilidh dances are cancelled for the rest of the season due to the threat of Covid 19, the restrictions that still exist and the slow vaccination rate.

We hope to start again in the fall of 2021, possibly Friday, September 24.  Updates will be announced as soon as there is definite news.  I shall try to continue with these newsletters to keep you informed.

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On a sad note – just as I sent out the last newsletter I heard about the death of a long time supporter of Scottish country dancing – Robert Lachlan MacLeod Coupe: January 30th, 1935 — January 29th, 2021.

Our thoughts and prayers are with his wife, Rosemary, and his family.  The link will lead you to a tribute put together by his son Malcolm.

https://katherinebrach.blogspot.com/2021/02/robert-coupe-fine-man-my-father-in.html

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Sprig Of Ivy  Boston Branch 50 Years Of Dancing With The Boston Branch

Robin beside the River Dee

Thanks for the many e-mails you sent with good wishes – they are much appreciated.  They prove that at least some people are enjoying the newsletters from as far as Australia and England.  Some even included some jokes etc.

Buckie Harbour

Another 2 weeks has flown by so fast!  I can barely remember what I did yesterday all the days seem the same.  We have had a lot of cloudy days but some sunshine, some rain, snow and wind.

I am going to change the format of the newsletter so you won’t get bored.  The newsletter takes quite a bit of time to get through.  You don’t have to check it out all at one sitting.  I have changed things a bit so I hope you will find it easier to do that.  Let me know what you think.

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Form STU, School of Scottish Studies.

We are so pleased to announce that the recipient of this year’s Jennifer Prosser Wade and Family Award in Scottish Studies is Emma Henderson. Emma is a fourth-year student currently completing a double major in English and History, as well as a certificate in Hellenic studies at SFU. 

 You can read more about Emma’s project on Mary Queen of Scots here: 

http://www.sfu.ca/scottishstudies/news-and-events/emma-henderson-wins-the-jennifer-prosser-wade-and-family-annual-.html

Congratulations, Emma! and we also extend heartfelt thanks to Jennifer Prosser Wade and family for sponsoring this important award to help students pursuing Scottish Studies topics at SFU. 

 

Not everything is locked down

 

Cullen viaduct

Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
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Next Thursday there will be try-outs for the choir.
They need all the help they can get.
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Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on
October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that
began in their school days.
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A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the
church hall. Music will follow.
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At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be
‘What Is Hell?’ Come early and listen to our choir
practice.
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Sheep dog trials

Union canal

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PHENOMENAL 2 LETTER WORD

UP

Read until the end …. You’ll laugh.

This two-letter word in English has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that word is UP.’ It is listed in the dictionary as an [adv], [prep], [adj], [n] or [v].

It’s easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP?

At a meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we speak UP, and why are the officers UP for election (if there is a tie, it is a toss UP) and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report? We call UP our friends, brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver, warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen. We lock UP the house and fix UP the old car.

At other times, this little word has real special meaning. People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses.

To be dressed is one thing but to be dressed UP is special.

And this UP is confusing: A drain must be opened UP because it is blocked UP..

We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night. We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP!

To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look UP the word UP in the dictionary. In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1 /4 of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions.

If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used. It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don’t give UP, you may wind UP with (UP to) a hundred or more.

When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP. When the sun comes out, we say it is clearing UP. When it rains, it soaks UP the earth. When it does not rain for awhile, things dry UP. One could go on and on, but I’ll wrap it UP, for now . . . My time is UP!

Oh . . . One more thing: What is the first thing you do in the morning and the last thing you do at night?

U
P!

Did that one crack you UP?

Don’t screw UP.. Send this on to everyone you look UP in your address book . . . Or not . . . it’s UP to you.

Now I’ll shut UP!

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Child gives up her seat on the bus

Roslin Glen

Two old Jewish men, Sid and Abe, are sitting in a Mexican restaurant one day.

Sid asks Abe, “Do you know if any people of our ancestry were ever born and raised in Mexico ?”

Abe replies, “I don’t know, let’s ask our waiter.”

When the waiter arrives, Abe asks, “Are there any Mexican Jews?”

The waiter says, “I don’t know senor, I ask the cooks.”

He returns from the kitchen after a few minutes and says, “No senor, the cook say no Mexican Jews.”

Abe isn’t satisfied and asks, “Are you absolutely sure?”

The waiter, realizing he is dealing with “Gringos” replies, “I check once again, senor,” and goes back into the kitchen.

While the waiter is away, Sid says, “I find it hard to believe that there are no Jews in Mexico . Our people are scattered everywhere.”

The waiter returns and says, “Senor, the head cook Manuel, he say there is no Mexican Jews.”

“Are you certain?” Abe asks again. “I just can’t believe there are no Mexican Jews!”

“Senor, I ask EVERYONE,” replies the exasperated waiter.

“All we have is Orange Jews, Grape Jews, Prune Jews, Tomato Jews and
Apple Jews, but no Mexican Jews.”

Don’t let the old man in!
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A balding, white haired man from Naples, Florida , walked into a jewelry store this past Friday evening with a beautiful much younger gal at his side.  He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.

The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring.

The man said, ‘No, I’d like to see something more special.’

At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over.   ‘Here’s a stunning ring at only $40,000’  the jeweler said. The lady’s eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement.

The old man seeing this said, ‘We’ll take it.’

The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the man stated, ‘By check. I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I’ll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I’ll pick the ring up Monday afternoon.’

On Monday morning, the jeweler angrily phoned the old man and said ‘Sir… There’s no money in that account.’

‘I know,’ said the old man… ‘But let me tell you about my weekend.’

Torabhaig-Distillery-Skye

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The Great Piano

Dave & Nadine are at the airport in Phoenix, awaiting their flight.  They are dressed in heavy boots, parka, scarf, mittens, all ready to head home to the Canadian winter.

An old American couple standing nearby in shorts are intrigued by their manner of dress.  The wife says to her husband, “Look at that couple.  I wonder where they’re from?” He replies, “How would I know?”  She counters, “You could go and ask them.”  He says, “I don’t really care. You want to know, you go ask them.”  She decides to do just that, walks over to the couple and asks, “Excuse me, I’ve noticed the way you’re dressed and I wonder where you’re from”.  Dave replies ,”Saskatoon, Saskatchewan.”

The woman returns to her husband who asks, “So, where are they from?” She replies, “I don’t know. They don’t speak English.”

Pentlands National Park

Spring Chicken (8×40 J)  David Cunningham Scottish Dance Band Silver Thistle Collection (The)

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Findlochty Harbour

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A husband went to police station to report his missing wife:

Husband : I’ve lost my wife, she went shopping yesterday and has still not come home.

Sergeant : What is her height ?

Husband : Oh, 5 something . . .

Sergeant : Build?

Husband : Not slim, not really fat.

Sergeant : Color of eyes?

Husband : Never noticed.

Sergeant : Color of hair?

Husband : Changes according to season.

Sergeant : What was she wearing?

Husband : Dress/suit/blue jeans — I don’t remember exactly.

Sergeant : Did she go in a car?

Husband : yes.

Sergeant : What kind of car was it?

Husband : 2015 Corvette Stingray LT3 with the Z51 Performance Package, shark gray metallic paint, with the 6.2 liter V8 engine with Direct Injection generating 460 HP. 8-speed paddle-shift automatic transmission, and GT bucket seats, and has a very thin scratch on the front left door
(at this point the husband started crying…)

Sergeant : Don’t worry sir. We’ll find your car.

Pfizer

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Rannoch Moor

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Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates.

St. Peter said, “I’d like to get you guys in now, but our computer’s down.””You will have to go back to Earth for about a week, but you can’t go as priests, so what’ll it be?”

 The first priest says, “I’ve always wanted to be an eagle, soaring above the Rocky Mountains.”

“So be it,” says St. Peter, and off flies the first priest.

The second priest mulls this over for a moment and asks, “Will any of  this week ‘count’ St. Peter?”

“No, I told you the computer’s down, There’s no way we can keep track of what you are doing.”

“In that case”, says the second priest, “I’ve always wanted to be a stud.”

“So be it” says St. Peter, and the second priest disappears.

A week goes by, the computer is fixed, and the Lord tells St. Peter to recall the two priests.

“Will you have any trouble locating them?” he asks.

“The first one should be easy,” says St. Peter, “He’s somewhere over the Rockies, flying with the eagles.”

But the second one could prove to be more difficult.”

“Why?” asks the Lord

“He’s on a snow tire, somewhere in Saskatchewan”

 

 

Great video commercial

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Elie beach

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Doug Smith is on his  deathbed and knows the end is  near.   His nurse, his wife, his  daughter and 2 sons, are with him.

He asks for 2 witnesses to be present and a camcorder be in place to record his last wishes, and when all is ready he begins to speak:

“My son, Bernie, I want you to take the Mayfair houses.”

“My daughter, Sybil, you  take the apartments over in the east end.”

“My son, Jamie, I want you to take the offices over in the City Centre.”

“Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings on the banks of the river.”

The nurse and witnesses are blown away as they did not realize his extensive holdings, and as Doug slips away, the nurse says,

“Mrs. Smith, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have accumulated all this property”.

…………..

Sarah replies, “Property ? …. The a**hole had a paper round”.

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Good Dorito ad

Isle of Bara airstrip

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Sunset on Islay

The Snow Eater (8x32j) – Scotch Mist –  Coast To Coast With Scotch Mist

ll events have been cancelled or postponed but you should check first.  Check up on your neighbours, friends and those in need.  A kind word will help their troubles, maybe some home made soup or baking?  There is much to be thankful for and we are blessed.  I hope you are all well and if not get better soon.  I would love to hear from you – drop me a line at duncanmackenzie@telus.net

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Drink beer?

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It is great to hear from you – thanks to all who sent me e-mails telling me of yourselves and how you are coping.

Hope this newsletter brings a smile to some faces.  Please forward it to all your friends.

Ardheslaid, Sheildaig

Your vaccination is coming – sometime – maybe this year – but it is coming!  

This would be fun to own but would need a lot a dough.

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                HOW I LOST MY TEETH          

I was in the Texas Rose last night, at the bar waiting for a beer,

when a butt-ugly, big old heifer (a girl) came up behind me,

and slapped me on the butt.

She said, “Hey sexy, how about giving me your number.”

I looked at her and said, ”Have you got a pen?”

She said, “I sure do.”

I said, “ Well, you better get back in it before the farmer notices

you’re missing.”

My dental surgery is on Monday.

Pass the salt

https://www.youtube.com/embed/6_-xTxP1hD4?autoplay=1

May your troubles be one, may your blessings be more,
and may nothing but happiness come through your door.

Duncan MacKenzie
ceilidh@rscdsvancouver.org