climbing the Cobbler in the Arrochar Alps

It is 30 more days (or 5 Fridays) until the next Ceilidh Dance on Friday, March 31st and I hope you are all planning to attend.  We had a so so attendance at the February dance so it would be nice to get more to come – maybe if you all bring a friend.  You all know what a fun night it is and it is pretty reasonable too at $15 or students $10 plus refreshments for a donation.  We really need more than 60 to break even.  The band refused to get paid properly last month and that should not be allowed.

Ceilidh dances are held in the Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver.  There is a free class at 7 pm then the dance follows from 8 – 10:30 pm with live music by Calanais.  All easy dances that are taught and called and everyone has lots of fun and great exercise.  Tell your friends and make it an outing – it only costs $15 ($10 for students) and there are refreshments (including cider & beer) for a donation.  Remember it is “cash only” both for admittance and the refreshments.  Mark your calendars now and make plans to join the fun.

If you have a group of 8 or more then the cost is $1 less for each of you.  You have to choose a password, make sure everyone in the group knows what it is then contact me at at least two days before the dance & let me know you have a group and what the password will be, then you do not need to all arrive together.

Scottish Country dance classes have started up again so check which classes fit your schedule and come along – many first nights are free – check out the new beginner class on the North Shore.


Here is some cheery upbeat Scottish Dance music to enjoy.

Smashing Set of Reels        Brown/Frew/Fraser/Wood/Collins       H.I.S.C.D.


Are You Smarter Than A 60 Year Old?


DON’T LOOK BELOW FOR THE ANSWERS UNTIL YOU HAVE TRIED IT OUT. A TEST FOR ‘OLDER’ KIDS. I was picky who I sent this to. It had to be those who might actually remember. So have some fun my sharp-witted friends. This is a test for us ‘older kids’! The answers are printed below, (after the questions) but don’t cheat! answer them first…..


  1. After the Lone Ranger saved the day and rode off into the sunset, the grateful citizens would ask, Who was that masked man? Invariably, someone
    would answer, I don’t know, but he left this behind. What did he leave behind?________________.


  1. When the Beatles first came to the U.S. In early 1964, we all watched them on The ____ ___________ Show.


  1. ‘Get your kicks, __ _________ _______.’


  1. 04. ‘The story you are about to see is true. The names have been changed to __________________.’
    is not
    ‘In the jungle, the mighty jungle, ________________.’


  1. After the Twist, The Mashed Potato, and the Watusi, we ‘danced’ under a stick that was lowered as low as we could go in a dance called the


  1. Nestle’s makes the very best . .. . . _______________.’


  1. Satchmo was America’s ‘Ambassador of Goodwill.’ Our parents shared this great jazz trumpet player with us. His name was _________________.


  1. What takes a licking and keeps on ticking? _______________.


  1. Red Skeleton’s hobo character was named __________________ and Red always ended his television show by saying, ‘Good Night, and ‘________
    ________… ‘


  1. Some Americans who protested the Vietnam War did so by burning their______________.


  1. The cute little car with the engine in the back and the trunk in the front was called the VW. What other names did it go by?
    ____________ &_______________.


  1. In 1971, singer Don MacLean sang a song about, ‘the day the music died.’
    This was a tribute to ___________________.


  1. We can remember the first satellite placed into orbit. The Russians did it. It was called ___________________.


  1. One of the big fads of the late 50’s and 60’s was a large plastic ring that we twirled around our waist. It was called the __________


  1. Remember LS/MFT _____ _____/_____ _____ _____?


  1. Hey Kids! What time is it? It’s _____ ______ _____!


  1. Who knows what secrets lie in the hearts of men? The _____ Knows!


  1. There was a song that came out in the 60’s that was “a grave yard smash”. It’s name was the ______ ______!


  1. Alka Seltzer used a “boy with a tablet on his head” as it’s Logo/Representative. What was the boy’s name? ________










  1. The Lone Ranger left behind a silver bullet.
    02. The Ed Sullivan Show
    03. On Route 66
    04. To protect the innocent.
    05. The Lion Sleeps Tonight
    06. The limbo
    07. Chocolate
    08. Louis Armstrong
    09. The Timex watch
    10. Freddy, The Freeloader and ‘Good Night and God Bless.’
    11. Draft cards (Bras were also burned. Not flags, as some have guessed)
    12. Beetle or Bug
    13. Buddy Holly
    14. Sputnik
    15. Hoola-hoop
    16. Lucky Strike/Means Fine Tobacco
    17. Howdy Doody Time
    18. Shadow
    19. Monster Mash
    20. Speedy



Kincardine ONeil Aberdeenshire


What a surprise was sprung on me at the Ceilidh dance last week.  After teaching a dance, which was unfamiliar to me, Alison called me over and announced that it was a new dance she had written and for which Janet had composed a new tune and that it was in my honour.  I was most surprised – pleasantly but taken aback.  The dance is called Ceud Mìle Fàilte or One hundred thousand welcomes and I am thrilled to show it to you all.

Ceud Mile Failte

Maybe it will be tried out at Ceilidh dances elsewhere – that would be wonderful?

The next thing on the RSCDS calendar is the Love to Dance Workshop and Dance which is also held at the Scottish Cultural Centre on March 4 with two great teachers – Rebecca Blackhall-Peters and   – plus music for the dance by Mary Ross.  Prior attendance at Scottish Country dance classes is required.  Registration at



This is really cool !!!


What happens if you wring out a wet towel while floating in space?

The water shouldn’t fall toward the floor because while orbiting the Earth, free falling objects will appear to float.

But will the water fly out from the towel or what?

The answer may surprise you.



Greenan Castle near Ayr




The 2023 season for Ceilidh Dances are scheduled (all on Friday evenings) as follows:-

March 31
April 28
September 29
October 27
November 24

Mark your calendars now!

The dances will be will be held at the Scottish Cultural Centre, 8886 Hudson Street, Vancouver.  The class will be held in the large hall from 7:00 – 7:45 then we will all exit to give the band a chance for a sound check etc. and the dance class will run from 8:00 – 10:30 with live music by Calanais.  Alison will continue to be your teacher/caller so you are guaranteed to have a great evening.  No change to the admission – still $15 with students $10.

Help us spread the word – I am not into social media but I am sure somebody can promote the Ceilidh Dance(s) there for me especially out at the Colleges and Universities.  Tell all your friends to come along – it really is a fun (and cheap!) evening.


Walking in the Coigach hills en route to Sgurr an Fhidhleir looking north to the wonderful mountains of Inverpolly and Assynt.

“Lexophile” is a word used to describe those that have a love for words, such as “you can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish”, or “to write with a broken pencil is pointless.” A competition to see who can come up with the best lexophiles is held every year in an undisclosed location.

This year’s winning submission is posted at the very end.

.. When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
.. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
.. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.
.. The batteries were given out free of charge.
.. A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.
.. A will is a dead giveaway.
.. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
.. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
. When you’ve seen one shopping center you’ve seen a mall.
.. Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
.. Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He’s all right now.
. A bicycle can’t stand alone; it’s just two tired.
.. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
.. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.
.. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
.. When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she’d dye.
.. Acupuncture is a jab well done That’s the point of it.

   And the cream of the twisted crop:
.. Those who get too big for their pants will be totally exposed in the end.





The coach had put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears. The only thing missing was a good quarterback. He scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn’t find a ringer who could insure a Super Bowl win.*

Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in the West Bank. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Israeli soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away.


He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.


Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.


“I’ve got to get this guy!” Coach said to himself. “He has the perfect arm!”

So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl.  The young man is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his Mother.

“Mom,” he says into the phone, “I just won the Super Bowl!”

“I don’t want to talk to you, the old woman says.” You are not my son!”

“I don’t think you understand, Mother,” the young man pleads. “I’ve won the greatest sporting event in the world. I’m here among thousands of my adoring fans.”

“No! Let me tell you!” his mother retorts. “At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn’t get raped!” The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,…

“I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago ”



Aerial view of the the Kincardine Bridge through the clouds.


Here is another tune;  for St. Patrick’s Day

Spanish Lady          Blackthorn            Singing the Travels


Maeall Ghaordaidh above Killin.







Lake of Menteith 



I used to be able to do cartwheels. Now I tip over putting on my underwear.

Hate it when I see an old person and then realize we went to high school together.

 I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes… so she hugged me.

 My wife says I only have 2 faults. I don’t listen and something else….

 At my funeral, take the bouquet off my coffin and throw it into the crowd to see who is next.

 I thought growing old would take longer.

 I came, I saw, I forgot what I was doing. Retraced my steps, got lost on the way back, now I have no idea what’s going on.

 The officer said, “You drinking?” I said, “You buying?” We just laughed and laughed…. I need bail money.

 Day 12 without chocolate. Lost hearing in my left eye.

 Scientists say the universe is made up of protons, neutrons and electrons. They forgot to mention morons.

 The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”

 A dog accepts you as the boss… a cat wants to see your resume.

 Oops…. did I roll my eyes out loud?

 Life is too short to waste time matching socks.

 Wi-fi went down for five minutes, so I had to talk to my family. They seem like nice people.

 If you see me talking to myself, just move along. I’m self-employed; we’re having a staff meeting.

 I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food.

 Some people call me crazy. I prefer ‘happy with a twist’.

 My doctor asked if anyone in my family suffers from mental illness. I said, “No, we all seem to enjoy it.”

 I really don’t mind getting old, but my body is having a major fit.

 Camping: where you spend a small fortune to live like a homeless person.

 Project Manager. Because Miracle Worker isn’t an official job title.

 I told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She made me an appointment for Tuesday.

 The world’s best antidepressant has 4 legs, a wagging tail and comes with unconditional love.

 Love is how excited your dog gets when you come home.

 I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.

 If you’re happy and you still know it, it’s your meds.




and another great tune  —  we could do with one!!  that is a snow eater!!
 The Snow Eater              Scotch Mist                     Coast to Coast
St. Andrew’s Castle

The Haircut

A teenage boy had just passed his driving test and inquired of his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car.

The father offered his son the following deal.   “You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little and get your hair cut.  Then we’ll talk about the car.”

The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he’d settle for the offer and they agreed on it.

After about six weeks his father said, “Son, you’ve brought your grades up and I’ve observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I ‘m disappointed you haven’t had your hair cut.”

The boy said, “You know, Dad, I’ve been thinking about that, and I ‘ve noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair, and there’s even strong evidence that Jesus had long hair.”

Got to love the Dad’s reply –

“Did you also notice they all walked everywhere they went.”


Elie Ness Lighthouse with North Berwick visible in the distance
Dornie in the Highlands
NEXT CEILIDH DANCE IS ON Friday, March 31, 2023
alert all your friends and acquaintances.
Hope to see many of you there 


May your troubles be one, may your blessings be more,
and may nothing but happiness come through your door.

Duncan MacKenzie